“It’s Buddy the Elf…”

Ahh… the Christmas holidays.

Lots of goodies to eat, special times with friends and family, Christmas cards and letters in the mail, and… lots of politics.

Since we are privileged to live in Iowa – with the coveted first in the nation caucus – every four years we get to spend our holidays with presidential hopefuls.

This was one of those years.

Every day the mailman leaves a handful of campaign mailings among the brightly colored Christmas cards.

Those really don’t bother me much – other than the horrible waste of resources. I just file them in the wastebasket as soon as they come in. 

What is really getting on our nerves is all the phone calls.

“Hi! This is so and so calling for so and so candidate…” Click.

“Hi! Stay on the line for a live town hall meeting with…” Click.

One candidate in particular is very annoying. We get a call from his campaign at least once a day. Interestingly – he’s one candidate that is rarely in the state campaigning – he just sends oodles of junk mail and annoys us with daily automated phone calls. We’re not impressed.

It was so bad that one afternoon when the phone rang I told Pedro that if it was that particular candidate I would scream.

It was.

I did.

I would estimate 98% of the calls we received in the last 4 weeks were either political or from telemarketers. No one wants to answer the phone anymore! And when we do -  we’re not always friendly.

The kids have started having lots of fun talking back to the canned calls – especially the ones that come during meal times.

“Hey – nice of you to call! Say hi to the wife and kids!”

“Great to hear from you! We’d be happy to spend New Year’s in the Bahamas with you!”

“Thanks for all the great campaign literature! We have enough now to wallpaper the chicken coop!”

But still the calls keep coming.

Finally Dagmar – after threatening to do it for weeks – answered the phone with a line borrowed from a favorite Christmas movie  -

“Hi! It’s Buddy the Elf! What’s your favorite color?”

There was silence on the other end – then a blessed click.

We doubled over with laughter!

Thankfully, the 2012 Iowa Caucus will soon be history and all the candidates will pack up their campaign literature and phone lists and annoy another state.

But until then – if Buddy the Elf should happen to answer when you call – just laugh and answer the question.

I can’t wait to see Dagmar’s expression when you do! :)

The Best Christmas Story of All

I’ve saved the best for last!

The very best Christmas story ever is the very first Christmas story ever…

The story of a tiny baby born in a stable in Bethlehem who grew to be the Savior of the world.

The true gift of Christmas

“And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory of the only begotten of the Father full of grace and truth…” John 1:13-15

May the glory of Christmas live in your hearts this Christmas!

Merry Christmas from my home to yours.

Photo courtesy of Nils Fretwurst.

“Chwistmas” Sausage

MeatI was in the midst of Christmas preparations Saturday afternoon when I heard a timid knock at the door.

I opened it to discover two adorable Amish children on my step, a little girl about seven and her five year old brother.

All rosy cheeked with big eyes – I decided that they must be from Herman’s, our southern neighbors, since the youngest ones to the north are all boys.

I couldn’t help but smile at their cuteness as I said, ” Well hello. How can I help you?”

The adorable little Amish girl looked terrified as she handed me a plastic grocery bag, “This is for you.”

I smile again and said, “Oh, thank you!”

My response must have given her courage, because she gave me a tentative little smile and added, “It’s ‘fwesh’ sausage.”

Then I understood – Herman’s had butchered that week and the older ones were all busy helping, so the younger ones were given the task of delivering a gift of sausage to the neighbor lady -me!

I gave them an even bigger smile and said, “Oh – that sounds yummy!”

She smiled a little bigger and said eagerly, “It’s ‘alweady’ salted and peppered!”

“Oh , so all I need to do is cook it and eat it?” I ask.

She’s nodded and added, “It’s for your Chwistmas!”

“Oh, Christmas sausage! That’s the best kind!” I say.

I’m rewarded with two very big, very relieved smiles.

“You stay right there!” I tell them – and walk into the kitchen and find two of the most sprinkle-covered sugar cookies.

Their eyes got big and they grinned from ear-to-ear as I put one in each of their mitten-covered hands.

“Thank you!” was their heart-felt response as they turned and started the half- mile walk home.

I smiled as I watched them go.

“Chwistmas” sausage, indeed!

Frugal Christmas Costumes

Things are gearing up for the children’s Christmas program at church with our performance Sunday night! :)

This year’s program takes place in Bible times – which means we needed period costumes for all the kids.

Dagmar decided it was time to retire the motley collection of plaid bathrobes that had served as costumes for several decades – and step things up a little.

But that wasn’t going to be cheap. Have you seen fabric prices lately?!

There was no way we were spending hundreds of dollars on costumes that would be used once a year for a couple of hours – especially when they are children in the world going to bed hungry tonight!

It was time to get creative!

We did find a great costume pattern with multiple looks and sizes on sale at Michael’s – then we started the hunt for material. Trust me – we left no stone unturned!

We raided Nana Shirley’s cupboards which yielded a few nice pieces and some great trims! Lorine, our resident seamstress at church, also found us some good stuff.

Then we started shopping garage sales, thrift stores and bargain bins.
White with PurpleOur best bargain? The plain white cotton sheet. They were cheap and pretty easy to find – and a little Rit dye turned them into whatever colored we needed!
King Herod
A shiny plaid piece from a garage sale made a great costume for King Herod, especially when topped with a vest made from a fake red velvet bed spread we found for a dollar at the local thrift store!

Blanket

The shepherds were really fun! A ratty old blanket turned into a great vest and an old bathroom rug with a hole in the middle became a sheepskin to throw over a shoulder.

Red with a bagWe used sheets, blankets, table cloths, curtains, table runners and even bed skirts to find the material we needed.

When she ran out of trims, Dagmar started used contrasting threads and played with the fancy stitches on the sewing machine to finish off the edges.

Aunt Julie came for a weekend to help her sew and put the finishing touches on everything.

The final result?

Some great looking and versatile costumes for a little bit of money.

And that works for me!

I’ve linked this post with Works For Me Wednesday at We Are That Family.

‘Twas the Night Before Christmas

Our Christmas story this week is one from my childhood. It’s the one story my own kids loved to hear – about the time that Aunt Sandy, Uncle Tim and their mom almost got into trouble on Christmas Eve.

1What child doesn’t love the excitement of Christmas Eve?!

Do you remember how hard it was to sleep after hanging your stockings?

Every year I would toss and turn in bed, trying to stay awake so that I could hear when those mysterious presents appeared under the tree.

I wasn’t the only one. My siblings were the same way.

One year in particular my brother, sister and I made an elaborate plan.

We would stay up until the presents appeared – and then we would sneak downstairs and check them out!

We lived in a big old farmhouse in rural Iowa. I was about 10 years old, which would make Sandy, 9 and Tim, 12.

We obediently went to bed when we were told and waited anxiously until all was quiet in the house. Then Sandy and I very quietly slipped out of bed and headed to Tim’s room at the top of the stairs.

He was waiting and ready with our secret stash of pilfered chocolate chips and dry Tang. We sat feasting in the light of our flashlights, trying not to giggle while we waited for the perfect time to make our foray downstairs.

When we were sure that everyone in the house was asleep – or maybe it was when we ran out of chocolate chips – we began our descent down the stairs.

Now remember – this is an older farm house and the stairs were pretty creaky. But my brother had been testing them for weeks. He knew exactly where each step creaked and had the pattern memorized so that we could sneak down those stairs without a sound.

Right side on the first step.

Middle on the second.

Back to the right on the third.

The fourth step is bad, skip it totally and go on to the left side of the fifth.

Step by step he silently led us down the stairs, my sister and I stepping exactly where he stepped.

We didn’t make a sound.

At the bottom of the stairs there were 2 doors. One opened into the living room with the tree and the stockings and all the gifts. The other opened into the newer addition which included a bathroom, utility room, and kitchen.

The door into the living room was closed and it creaked, but the bathroom door was open. The plan was to quietly go through the bathroom, out the other door to the utility room, circle around through the kitchen, and enter the living room where we would use our flashlights to scope out our presents.

The three of us were in line. Tim, in the lead, noiselessly slipped through the first bathroom door like a hunter stalking his prey. I was close behind, followed by Sandy.

Now that we were in the newer part of the house the floors didn’t creak. We were close now! Our excitement surged and Tim picked up speed. He took the next bathroom door at a semi-run with me right at his heels. We had just about rounded the utility room when we heard the loud crash!

We looked back in horror to see Sandy in a heap on the floor – she had gone too fast and tripped on the bathroom rug!

It took a second for the reality of the situation to hit – we were out of bed at midnight on Christmas Eve with flashlights and the smell of pilfered chocolate chips on our breath!

And we had just made enough noise in the quiet house to wake the dead!

We turned tail and took the stairs three at a time. We jumped into bed, pulling the covers up over our heads.

Then, despite our excitement and all that extra sugar, we fell sound asleep.

Before we knew it – it was Christmas morning and we hadn’t been caught!

We ran down the stairs with sheepish expressions and saw all the gifts that had eluded us the night before.

As far as I can remember, that was our last Christmas Eve mission. We soon grew too old for those midnight raids, but it sure makes a fun memory!

You know – I haven’t had dry Tang in years! :)