The Little Things

Part Two in the blog series on “Taking Your Marriage From Fine to Fabulous”. Last week we looked at Date Nights. Today’s topic is those “little things” in a marriage.

QuiltI’ve always loved quilts. I’m amazed at how a quilter can take separate pieces of material and turn them into one beautiful creation.

The definition of a quilt is simple – a bed coverlet of two layers of cloth filled with padding held in place by ties or stitched designs.

I’ve found from experience that the more stitches or ties that are binding the pieces together – the longer the quilt lasts.

Several years ago I sewed a quilt for Matt’s bed. It looked nice at first – but since I made it very quickly, the few ties that I put in to hold it together soon broke in the strain of use.

I have another quilt that my Grandma made for me during my college years. She carefully tied it every few inches making a tight and warm covering that has stood the test of time and is still being used today.

One quilt lasted and one didn’t.

Marriage is like a quilt.

It begins as two separate lives that are bound together by a vow.

Then the process of “quilting” begins.

A good quilter knows that many small stitches hold better than a few big ones. The same is true of marriage. It’s the little things in daily life that will make a marriage strong.

Little things that say “I love you and you are important to me.”

Things like – getting up early to make your husband breakfast and packing his lunch before he leaves for work.

And getting the special “thank you – I appreciate this” look while he holds your hand and blesses  that breakfast.

It’s when your husband puts a CD in and immediately goes to your favorite song, or when he gives you all the M & M’s from his trail mix, or takes the dish towel from you and sends you to the couch to rest.

It’s letting your husband eat the last piece of apple pie, or choose what to watch on TV, or sleep undisturbed in the recliner on a Sunday afternoon.

It’s a kiss when they leave and a kiss when they return.

It’s a phone call at lunch break, a back rub, a shared joke.

It’s taking time to really listen.

It’s putting their needs ahead of your own.

It’s those little things.

Stitch by stitch. Everyday. Binding your hearts together.

“Little Things Mean A Lot”
Kitty Kallen

Blow me a kiss from across the room
Say I look nice when I’m not
Touch my hair as you pass my chair
Little things mean a lot

Give me your arm as we cross the street
Call me at six on the dot
A line a day when you’re far away
Little things mean a lot

Don’t have to buy me diamonds and pearls
Champagne, sables or such
I never cared much for diamonds and pearls
’cause honestly, honey, they just cost money

Give me your hand when I’ve lost the way
Give me a shoulder to cry on
Whether the day is bright or gray
Give me your heart to rely on

Send me the warmth of a secret smile
To show me you haven’t forgot
For always and ever, now and forever
Little things mean a lot

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7 Responses

  1. You found the words to “our” song!! Love it! Great illustration!

  2. I love this post comparing a good marriage to the quilt sewn carefully with lots of tiny stitches holding it together. It has inspired me to sprinkle today with some extra ‘stitches’ thanks 🙂 Jennifer x

  3. This is so true. Steve and I look at our friends marriages and see how they’re struggling right now, and we thank God for blessing us and reminding us of that blessing day after day. We honestly believe the struggles we went through with infertility made our marriage a 100 times stronger. Just because going in we knew it could push us apart and we vowed and prayed that instead God would use it to pull us together.

  4. Oh, this is one of the most lovely analogies I think I’ve ever read. I think more young couples need to learn this, to feel the truth of it. Society would have us believe that love and romance is in the grand gestures… but it really is those little “stitches” that bond and hold us together through it all. Beautiful post.

  5. I am an amiture qilt top peicer and very amiture quilter and appriciate the annalogies you make here. It’s very true, we will celebrate our 13 year anniversary this year. When we met I was 15 and we were married just before my 20th birthday. He’s my best friend in this world! I have told him from the beginning that the only one I love more than him is God. We remind eachother often to focus on the Maker often and by His grace we love and respect one another more than either of us have ever seen. As we have grown into a family of four (our son is six and our daughter is four) the Father has continued to show us how to show our love to oneanother. They ways we show it has changed and I am thankful for the grace that we have both shown eachother by the guidance of the Lord. *smile* It’s true, the little things carry us through the tough times or harsh words that are inevitably spoken in frustration with the world or those we love most. The little things that are always there, the smile, the compliments of “mmm! it smells like hom” when he walks in the door to dinner. Or when he walks in and dinner is nowhere in sight and he smiles at the joy he sees in the home he is giving his family. Those things give me strength and desire to be a better wife and momma. *smile* Sometimes that’s EASY, other times not so much. *smile* God is good and I am thankful that He is the tie that binds the two of us together and that He is so involved in our day to day lives! *smile* Have a blessed day and thanks for this reminder and focus for the morning. *smile* Sincerely, Mommy of two little blessings & SO much more!

  6. What a lovely blog post….love the comparsion to a quilt. I have been blessed to be married to the same sweet man for many decades and am so thankful for him…

  7. Beautiful. It really is all about the little things – if we don’t make an effort with the little things then why would we with the big things?